Justice Minotaur has asked that a report be compiled on “what in tarnation everyone on the staff is reading this summer” and that the list be published by means of this electronic bulletin. He also commanded that there be no puns used here involving the word “list,” such as “to the lists,” “the wind bloweth where it listeth,” or “checking it twice.” The report, as faithfully compiled by Mr. Cornwall while battling scurvy, follows:
Justice Korbin Minotaur, justice of the peace. Daily Nugget of Wisdom (TM) Calendar for Those with Atopic Dermatitis.
Yao Mingsley, yoghurt steward. The History of McGruff the Crime Dog They Don’t Want You to Know.
Gilded Shears, lector. Probing the Origins of Felt.
Barbie Self-Howitzer, ornatrix. Fires of Agamemnon, Volume 3, Part B: The Minced Oath. Volume 16 of The Putrescent Tube Mysteries.
Lyman Tinywatson, bailiff. The Wet Metal Bowl: How to Get More Out of Life by Imagining the Horrors of Electrocution.
Phamily Junebride, necessary woman. 1,001 Poems on Vulpicide.
Duchess Shilly Hazzard, karateka. Privy Dirt: An Oral History of New Salem’s Greatest Rock Band.
Hardwood Marx, biographer. Writing a Biography That Doesn’t Totally Suck.
Mike.jpeg Winner, internuncio. Speech of Mr. Burges, of Rhode Island, on the Motion to Strike from the General Appropriation Bill the Salary Appropriated for the Minister of Russia. Delivered in the House of Representatives, February 3, 1831.
Lemmon Khrisph, gong farmer. The Daily Use of Trust Falls as a Way to Build Deep, Abiding Trust in Families, Workplaces, Communities, and Nations.
Eric of Cornwall [listed last, per the command of Justice Minotaur], court clerk. The Bible for Left-Handed People.
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