Addendum to journal entry for 1/6/15: Justice Minotaur is seeking investors in his new clothing company. The first one thousand individuals who invest more than $20,000 each (U.S. dollars) will get their choice of either (1) a bandolier labeled in large block letters with the saying “Don’t laugh–it’s paid for” or (2) a real fur cape with “WIDE LOAD” bleached across the back.
Journal entry, 1/6/15: Justice Minotaur announced today that come spring, he would start manufacturing and selling clothing and accessories made primarily from the wool of his own llamas. “This luxurious animal fiber will be like Michelangelo’s David, putting the whole world under a spell,” he averred.
He will in fact have two clothing labels. The first, called Minotaur, will be sold at Costco and Sam’s Club in bundles, with each bundle having four identical winter coats, one pair of fingerless mittens, a monocle, one ski mask, one banker’s visor, two leather riding cloaks, one pair of briefs, fourteen pairs of above-the-calf gray socks, two pairs of capri pants, two sleeveless Iron Maiden T-shirts, a three-pack of dental night guards, and a set of neon yellow wristbands. “This one-size-fits all line will be primarily intended for refugees, runaways, and others who had to flee their home under unfortunate circumstances,” Minotaur explained. “These people don’t have time or the cabbage to shop Kohl’s for sales every weekend for a month. These people want to come into Costco with two twenties and leave with a new wardrobe–and maybe a slice of their delectable pizza!–ten minutes later.”
The other line will be called Korbin Private Label. At first Minotaur will offer only unisex blazers in this line, but he intends it will eventually expand widely, “including to hosiery and beekeeper garb.” An estimated starting price is about $125,000 per garment. “This label is for the man or woman who has taken the Bible to heart–who is literally willing to give all that he or she has for a pearl of great price.”